Dear Teacher, You Deserve to Put Yourself First

I don't talk about this often, but during my third year as a teacher, I vowed that I was going to leave the profession within the next five. I was ready to say so-long to teaching and jump all into something that left me feeling more fulfilled at the end of each day.

I was at the point in my career where I was facing major burn out. I was no longer finding joy in what I was doing, and even though I knew I was making an impact as a teacher, it didn't seem "worth it" to me anymore.

The politics, the parents, the lack of value for education, the disrespect from students....

I was tired of it, so I decided to spend my energy elsewhere and pursue new passions.

...until COVID happened. During a time of major uncertainty for teachers and everyone else, so many people started looking at new paths and careers. Instead, I did the opposite. I used this time as an opportunity to dial in on why I became an educator in the first place. I re-assessed my purpose as a teacher and deep dove into what I truly wanted to accomplish. I evaluated my curriculum, I found new appreciation for the time I got to spend with my students (once we came back to school), and I allowed myself to remember that connections come before curriculum every day of the week.

I allowed myself to stop stressing about standards, about lessons, about societal expectations... and I decided to just BE... be the teacher I was meant to be, the teacher I knew I COULD BE... and the one I knew my students needed me to be.

Through this journey of self-reflection, I also realized the importance of taking time to be the best ME so that I could be the best teacher. I started putting myself first, setting boundaries, and focusing on the things that brought me the most joy.

And Teacher, you need to do that, too.

I know that it's hard to put yourself first, especially when you have so many people counting on you during such a crazy time. I know you're tired. I know you don't have time. But I also know that doing these things below are CRUCIAL to keeping educators like YOU, educators we NEED, in this profession. So please, Teacher... remember to prioritize yourself.

Bookend Your Days with YOU

I can't stress the importance of starting and ending your days with time for yourself. Personally, having my morning routine is what keeps me grounded. And while it sucks getting up at 4:30 some days, when I get to school bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, it's totally worth it.

Your routine doesn't have to be super long, and it doesn't have to be complex. It just has to give you time to focus on YOU before you go and focus on everyone else. Find what works for you, what prepares you for the day, and what awakens your spirit.... and try to move your body for at least 30 minutes. It's a game changer.

For me, my morning routine starts when my alarm goes off at 4:30 AM. I sleep with my phone across my bedroom, so no matter how badly I want to hit the SNOOZE button when I hear it, I can't... unless I get out of bed to turn it off first and crawl back into bed afterward. By that time, it seems pretty pointless. Yeah, I'm mad at myself for like...30 seconds, but then I am so grateful that I kept my word to myself and allowed plenty of time in the morning before having to rush out the door.

Once I'm up, I trudge to the bathroom and throw on my work out clothes. I pick them out the night before so they are ready to go. This eliminates having to make a decision early in the morning (I also pick out my clothes for school beforehand) which frees up that brainpower for bigger decisions throughout the day.

I start my routine my doing some house chores, which, I know, sounds strange, but it's what works for me. I've tried a lot of routines over the last three years, and this part I swear by. By time I get home from school at night, I DREAD doing tedious things like dishes and picking up the house, and I hate spending my weekends doing laundry, so I decided to start doing them in the mornings instead. I put my wireless headphones in and throw on a personal development podcast (it's so important to fill your mind with positivity first thing in the morning) and get to work. Things like dishes, decluttering, packing lunches, and folding clothes are mindless activities that don't require any thought but that force me to be on my feet and wake my body up.

Once those are done, I find my way to my office where I cuddle with my cat and read my personal development book for 20 minutes. Again - notice how I frontload the positivity ASAP in the morning to set my day up for good thoughts and success! Then I head downstairs to workout for 30-45 minutes each day. Moving my body first thing in the morning is my favorite thing to do because it releases endorphins and gives me energy.

And some days, I even add in a cold shower after my workout for a splash of even MORE energy. There's no way you can still be sleepy after that! Brutal, but effective.

When all this is said and done, I get ready for school and head out for my 30 minute commute, while listening to a podcast of course (see a trend here, anyone?). The days I really need some extra hype, I'll throw on an old school playlist for the last part of my drive to pump me up for the day ahead. Nothing like some solid Blink 182 in at 7:00 in the morning.

Similar to the importance of a MORNING routine, I think it's equally important to END your day with you as well to allow your mind time to decompress. As teachers, we face and hear SO much throughout the day that it tends to be a lot to manage. I encourage you to find at least 30 minutes each night to focus on YOU. Maybe that looks like a walk by yourself, journaling, meditating, or taking a bath. But whatever it is, make sure YOU are the priority.

Stop Working Over Your Lunch

I don't know when it became the norm to sacrifice our only time to eat during our work days, but I think this needs to change. I totally understand that as teachers, we sometimes have lunch meetings or students who need extra help, but please, Teacher, don't make a habit of giving up your lunch every day.

Just like the time after school, we need the time to decompress and reset our minds to tackle the rest of the day. The is the only time we have to really talk to people our own age throughout the day, and honestly, some great ideas can be born from lunchtime conversations with colleagues.

This means that you are also getting yourself OUT OF YOUR ROOM to eat. My first two years as a teacher, I got in the habit of never leaving my room and making it to the lounge to converse with other teachers. And while I wasn't necessarily working with students during this time, I found myself grading or planning while mindlessly eating my food at the same time. That means my brain was continuously on overdrive mode for 9+ hours straight.... and then we wonder why we start to feel burn out. Hmm.

So do me a favor, and tomorrow, find your way down to the teacher's lounge and have lunch with someone other than your computer screen.

Stop Bringing Work Home

And while you're at it, stop staying late. This is advice I got as a first year teacher but never implemented. I constantly found myself staying until 5:00 or 6:00 at night and still bringing work home to grade on the weekends. While that was sometimes necessary as a first year teacher, it definitely didn't make my job any EASIER.

... because it only resulted in me being exhausted, frustrated, and overworked.

So my second year, I made a vow to myself to never - unless absolutely necessary - bring work home. As long as I was prepared for the next day, that was enough. As for the grading... I promise it can wait.

I am super upfront about this with my students as well. I think it's important that we teach them boundaries, and boundaries for me do NOT include working for hours when I'm not being paid to work. Boundaries for me means I am prioritizing time for myself and time with my family in the evenings and on the weekends, and I communicate this with them to help them see the importance of them putting THEMSELVES first, too.

I still try my best to get things graded in a timely manner so it remains relevant, but that's also the beauty of informal feedback in class!

Get Involved

... but wait. Didn't you just say to stop staying late and to set boundaries?

Yes, yes I did. And I understand that this totally contradicts what I just said, but hear me out.

During my first two years teaching middle school, I never got involved with extra curriculars. There weren't a lot of sports games for me to attend, and I lived over an hour away from my school, so staying until 9:00 PM for any events was not ideal.

When I switched to working in a high school, I told myself I would get more involved in getting to know my students outside of school, but I didn't make it a priority. Then COVID happened, and my second year I didn't even have the option to go watch them play sports, in the musical, in concerts, etc.

But this year, I made it a focus of mine. I started attending sporting events, and I became the lead coordinator of our freshmen transition program which allows me to work with our junior and senior leaders in a different setting. And yes, sometimes attending a 7:00 PM game means I stay in my room for three hours to grade or plan and I don't get home until 9:00 PM, but it has also made my teaching easier.

It's allowed me to build relationships with my students and to show them I truly care about them and their interests, and THAT transfers over into my classes... which definitely makes it worth it in my book.

At the end of the day, it's about finding BALANCE and about doing what is BEST for you, not what you think you HAVE to do. So yes, some nights I stay late and grade, and some weekends I find myself grading an essay or two, but not because I feel like I have no other choice. Rather, I have found myself enjoying my career so much that I enjoy staying to plan an extra lesson or watch my students' sport's games. Most importantly, even on those days, I still make sure that I am coming first.

So... Where Do You Start?

If you are a teacher who is used to staying late every day, bringing work home on weekends, and finding yourself with little time for yourself, I'm sure you're thinking, yeah, that's great for you, Paige... but it's easier said than done.

To which I say... of course it is! EVERYTHING is easier said than done. SAYING something literally only requires you to move your lips.... DOING something requires you to make CHANGES and SACRIFICES.

And it's going to take TIME. New habits need to be built, and you need to remember how to put yourself first again. So if you're wondering where in the world you should even START, here's my advice:

This week, commit to finding just 15 minutes of your day - either before or after school - to spend by yourself. Take a walk. Get some fresh air. Journal. Meditate. Take a bath. If you have kids, ask someone to watch them for you, or get up earlier than you normally do. Find a way to make it work. Prioritize yourself.

If you are used to working through your lunch, commit to just one or two days a week where you don't. Keep them consistent from week to week so you know that on those days, you aren't available.

If you typically stay late or bring work home, choose ONE night of the week where you will allow yourself to do so. Make that night your "work" night, so then you know the other nights will be for YOU and you leave the papers at school.

Choose ONE event this week - sporting event, choir concert, etc. - to attend and cheer on your students. Ask them what they have coming up. Build those relationships!

And remember, Teacher... you DESERVE this. Because we need you.

Until next time,

Paige